X-Files Rerun "The Host"

“560,000 people a day call my office on the porcelain telephone.”

Originally Aired 9/23/94

My senior year high school English class was mostly a joke, as we barely did anything resembling typical class work. Each week we had a chapter to complete in our vocabulary workbook, and then on Friday we were treated to a short quiz and an episode of Futurama. On one fateful Friday, the teacher popped in an episode of The X-Files and I was hooked instantly by a mutated worm-like man creature, who I now affectionately call The Flukeman; his action figure is glaring at me from his spot on my shelf as I type this. It did take me a few more years to become a full-fledged fan but I wouldn’t be typing these reviews today if it weren’t for that English class.

In the premiere of Season Two, “Little Green Men”, Mulder was tipped off to alien activity by a senator, and this week he’s given a case that’s similar to his work on The X-Files when an unidentified body is found in the sewer. Mulder takes the case to Scully for her medical expertise, and he also finds out he has an anonymous friend within the FBI. I like how there is more at work here than just a monster of the week, as Mulder continues his rocky relationship with his boss, Assistant Director Skinner; he continues his secret relationship with Scully; and now he finds out about a new relationship, a secret admirer.

There is even something new I’ve picked up on this time, which is the episode has a geographic discrepancy. A Russian ship that had hazardous leftovers from Chernobyl is floating off the Eastern coastline of the United States, yet I thought Sarah Palin said she could see Russia from her backyard in Alaska, which is on the opposite side of the country. Possibly Sarah Palin doesn’t know her geography, Chris Carter doesn’t know his, or perhaps I’m not well-versed on history and don’t know that the Jersey Shore was a historical dumping site for radioactive waste. I guess that explains Snookie and her pals.

I’m such an X-Files nerd and I don’t take this job of reviewing episodes lightly, which is why I’ve discovered another interesting fact about this episode. When the FBI concludes that they must take this Flukeman into custody, I thought it was the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever seen on any television show, yet a split second later something dawned on me. One of my favorite X-Files lines is from a first season episode, where Mulder says, “that’s one of the luxuries to hunting down aliens and genetic mutants, you rarely get to press charges.” This must be one of those rare occasions he was talking about it!

“The Host” remains one of my favorite episodes, not just because these new facts add an entertaining element. This is a top-notch episode of the series with a creative creature and creepy visuals that the series is known for. The final scene even reminds me of those Friday the 13^th movies that slowly zoom in on Crystal Lake and Jason’s watery grave, and then he suddenly blinks! The most important fact is that Port-a-potties have never been the same again.

X-Files Rerun "Little Green Men"

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X-Files Rerun "The Erlenmeyer Flask"

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X-Files Rerun "Roland"

"I don't think they'll be performing this experiment on Beakman's World."
Originally Aired 5/6/94

I always watch an episode twice before I start writing my review. Usually the first time is to sit back and enjoy it, then the second time I'll pick out phrases and scenes that I can highlight. During the second time watching "Roland", I noticed David Nutter's name was attached as the director. I believe he's partially responsible for the success of this episode. I don't think the plot is all that thrilling, with jet engine experimenting and cryogenics, so it would have to rely on the actors' performances to get anything interesting out of it. Which is exactly what David Nutter did through the casting of guest actor Zeljko Ivanek as the title character. He brings a sweetness and sadness to the role of Roland. This episode also contains one of my favorite pieces of music from the entire run of the series, "Roland's Theme", which is a simple tune on the piano that is both sad and haunting.

Something I've always noticed in movies and television is that when people have dreams or visions, it's always in the 3rd person. You never see them performing an action through their own perspective, so as a director I would strive to be as accurate as possible, deadlines be damned! I know why they reuse footage; I'm just being silly and nitpicky. Another small nitpick is that I would think as the temperature of Roland's popsicle brother increased, he would lose his psychic link. Instead its Scully who asks Roland to turn off the machine. I guess that explains the ending scene where Roland brushes his hair before leaving the half-way house- is Arthur still inside of his head?

X-Files Rerun "Born Again"

The "No Witty Subtitles" Edition
Originally Aired 4/29/94

"I'll say something crazy, you'll shoot me down; rinse and repeat."

This episode might be more enjoyable if it didn't feel just like "Shadows" from earlier in the season. It's a Law & Order-styled plot with revenge from beyond the grave, this time via reincarnation in the form of an 8-year old girl. Years ago several cops were involved in a dirty deal, with one of them being a reluctant participant so he was "offed" by the rest, only now he's getting revenge through young Michelle Bishop. Mulder and Scully are called to the scene when one of those cops dies, leaving Michelle as the only witness. Cue The Twilight Zone theme. While I was never a huge fan of The X-Files theme, it does have that same simplistic hum of The Twilight Zone's, and is a good fit for following these wacky supernatural shenanigans in each episode's teaser.

I do like the way the investigation unfolds though, as Mulder discovers the mutilated dolls match the wounds inflicted on Charlie, while his wife mysteriously receives Origami that Michelle also has a fascination with creating. Another interesting point is that they use hypnosis on Michelle to make her relive her past lives under Mulder's assumption she's Charlie Morris, which reminds me of Mulder's therapy to learn details of his sister's abduction. Since I'm watching this after seeing Season 4's "The Field Where I Died", that episode also used the same hypnosis to relive past life experiences.

"Born Again" isn't among the worst episodes of this first season, though Howard Gordon's name would be attached to better episodes over the next 3 seasons. After writing reviews for these first four seasons and now redoing them, I'm sensing a few patterns in my style of writing and also of the series. An absence of one-liners from Mulder is a clue to the quality of an episode, while an absence of a good caption from me is another.

X-Files Rerun "Tooms"

"You can get the next mutant."

Originally Aired 4/22/94

Best red herring ever?

Following the Pilot and the Season One finale, I believe this is the most important episode of the first season. “Beyond the Sea”, with the introduction of Scully’s family, gives this episode a run at that claim; however “Tooms” is the first sequel in the series’ history. A few earlier episodes this season can be connected as the foundation of the mythology (“Pilot”, “Deep Throat”, “Fallen Angel”, “E.B.E.”), yet the events of those episodes were never followed up, like the disappearance of Max Fenig. Besides featuring the return of one of my favorite villains, Eugene Victor Tooms, this episode also features the return of the mysterious suited smoker, and introduces the X-Files’ superior, Assistant Director Skinner.

I really liked the introduction of Skinner because Scully’s job of debunking Mulder was never really followed up on as much as I think it could have been. While she did type up reports during episodes and she was always challenging Mulder’s theories, she only met with that Section Chief Blevins guy one other time. I bet there might have been the idea to keep Mulder and Scully at odds longer but producers and writers may have noticed the chemistry of Gillian and David, so they changed plans. So I think Skinner was there to add that mysterious element; is he a friend or a foe, even a tool of this smoking man? And adding him actually brought them closer together.

After making this statement, I have another: while I love “Squeeze”, I’ve rarely watched “Tooms.” It’s probably strange but I can’t explain it. I just remember that Tooms is released on parole, and then he tries to frame Mulder, before getting grinded into bits under an escalator. It is a really fun episode with plenty of creepy moments and humor from Mulder. Tooms just acts way creepier here and what I call his “liver vision” is more effective. Though I still wonder if he hibernates 30 years, then wakes up to feed, how did he ever age enough to become a healthy-looking 30 year old man? It could have been cool to follow up on the body they found in concrete and how he was actually linked to Tooms, though the direction they went with the story worked well enough. Another thing I want to mention is that people have said The Cigarette-Smoking Man is the series’ version of Darth Vader, yet after seeing him sitting in the chair with his weathered face, he is more like the Emperor in the Star Wars movies. He’s the puppet-master who’s pulling Skinner’s strings.

I liked the ending as well with Mulder telling Scully that a change is coming. After watching Seasons 3 and 4 and noticing that the final standalone hints at what’s to come in the finale, it seems like “Tooms” could be better suited before “The Erlenmeyer Flask”. Now we'll have two more standalones to ponder what’s on the horizon for Mulder and Scully.