"Nothing Important Happened Today II"

"She's the key to everything in this case, right to the FBI."
Originally Aired 11/18/01

Typically the season finales and season premieres of The X-Files feature all of the big players returning to the series for their two-part, and even three-part, story arcs. This is the lightest it's ever been since the first season ended. All of the Syndicate was burnt to a crisp, the Smoking Man took a spill down a flight of stairs, while the remaining men in black have taken a bullet to the head, leaving us with the bare bones "agents vs evil FBI" story which was the central arc for the series in its earliest episodes. That, in theory, should be a good storyline to center this 9th season around, with Doggett and Reyes trying to see just how deep the Super Soldiers have infiltrated the government.

Instead, this episode muddies up the weird plot from last week, involving a conspiracy to tamper with the water supply, and it now somehow involves a big boat. Before I viewed this episode again, I used to think the boat should've been linked to the alien oil which resurfaced in last season's "Vienen." Perhaps the infected oil workers managed to stow away and spread the virus on land, which I think would have made more sense than what we got. "Nothing Important Happened Today II" tries to link the dead water treatment workers to this boat, which is then connected to the Super Soldiers' plot, and somehow that all ties to Scully's baby. Scully's son William also might be part alien, and it's odd to me how she never refers to him by his name; she only says "my baby." Nothing happened is a fairly accurate title.

Shannon (played by Lucy Lawless, by way of whispy Marita Covarrubius) is a Super Soldier that confesses her story to Team Mulder, yet she could be playing them just like everyone else who ever told Mulder anything government conspiracy-related. We've seen this before countless times. Brad Follmer returns from last week too, still trying unsuccessfully to keep Reyes from working with Doggett so her reputation won't be tarnished. Knowle Rohrer was assumed dead after an explosion at the end of Season 8, and now he's back as well, lending some truth to Shannon's tale of the "unstoppable" Super Soldiers. Most times these season premiere story arcs end up being fairly weak anyway, but I can't help but feel like this is all just "Alien Bounty Hunter-lite", and replace the bees with water. Their little neck protrusion just doesn't match the visual effect of the bubbling alien blood either.

The best part of this episode is John Doggett, who's slipped into Mulder's Nikes so well that he's even borrowing his lines, when he tells Scully and Reyes that "she is the key to everything." Later Doggett nearly gets his head popped like a pimple by Knowle, before he has a scene with Kersh that is the highlight of this entire two-parter. It's so good that it nearly redeems the previous 80 minutes of TV; except that it's a condensed version of an even better scene! Kersh and Doggett get their dialogue chopped in half, likely by the same cutting crew that lifted a scene with Krycek and CSM from "One Son" that gave reason for Alex attempting to dupe the Smoking Man again. Robert Patrick and James Pickens, Jr. seem to have a real chemistry together that makes these scenes with Doggett and Kersh so fun to watch. It's a shame the rest of these episodes just aren't as good.

"Nothing Important Happened Today"

"So what I'm hearing, if I don't drop it, I'm alone on this."
Originally Aired 11/11/01

It's weird, usually in the 'off-season' I'll still watch the series, or even re-write reviews of the early seasons for my blog. My earliest reviews were Facebook Notes, which are likely now lost in the abyss. I think that feature is long deceased. The weird part is that I can count the amount of episodes that I've watched since May on one hand, which were a couple from the recent X-Files "Event Series" when it hit Blu Ray, and a few other comedy episodes when I was in the mood for a laugh. I can't lay blame for my lack of enthusiasm on that "Event Series", since it had already aired and wrapped long before I finished viewing all of Season 8. Not even (briefly) meeting David Duchovny over the summer could give me a boost of the necessary excitement. I feel it's not even that Season 9 is as terrible as it's made out to be by the legions of "X-Phile" fans. Personally, it's that my quest that I started in 2008 is nearing its end. I started this lengthy process of writing and reviewing the entire 9 season run in the fall of 2008; which coincidentally was the first time I moved out of my parents' house. Now, here I sit at a computer, struggling to write a review, while also weighing the pros and cons of moving back into my parents' house. Is this a vicious cycle? 

It's been said before that The X-Files was unable to figure out it's place in the world, post-9/11. After finally viewing this episode within the context of the series, I think The X-Files was just unable to recover from the loss of it's star, David Duchovny. My inability to completely leave my parents' house must be exactly what was happening for Chris Carter, mirroring his inability to let go of Fox Mulder. Carter "lost" Mulder once before in the previous season, with Duchovny appearing only in the second half of the season, and again was never given a proper exit from the series at the season's conclusion. This episode, "Nothing Important Happened Today", picks up within a day or two following last season's finale, "Existence", when Scully had given birth to her baby boy and Doggett hand-selected Agent Reyes as his new partner. He launched an investigation against his boss, FBI Deputy Director Kersh, who appears to be linked with the series' new villains, the alien replacements known as "Super Soldiers." Except Dogget and Reyes realized their only evidence, which was on a security camera, has been erased. I guess that means Krycek is forgotten as well, because apparently someone has scraped his body off the pavement. Poor guy, after all these years he ended up with the same fate as Agent Spender. At the time when I first watched this episode years ago, I always wondered why Skinner wasn't in as much hot water as Doggett over the whole parking garage shooting.

In fact, Skinner is pretty much a non-factor in this episode. Team Mulder, or now rather Team Doggett, has too many people on that side so the writing staff decided to add another character to the mix to balance it out. Team Kersh, for lack of a better term at the moment, adds Assistant Director Brad Follmer (reference to a real-life member of the production crew) played by Cary Elwes. I noticed his real-life English accent slipped through right away when he pronounced Hoover Building as "Hoo-vah." His portrayal of Follmer is much better than I had previously given him credit for, although the characterization is still fuzzy at best.

I did notice something as well that I hadn't realized before, which is precisely the reason why I wanted to watch these episodes in order and stretch them out like I've been doing. Having not watched this episode since mid-2008, it now feels "fresh" and slightly new, so mission accomplished. That realization I had is actually that this season premiere mirrors last season's premiere- Mulder is "missing"; there's an investigation within the ranks of the FBI, which is now led by Kersh's appointed stooge Brad Follmer, rather than Doggett; the vague presence of those Super Soldiers, who no doubt cleaned up the evidence from the parking garage, mirrors the Bounty Hunter(s) cleaning up evidence of alien abductions; and the biggest of all is that Doggett has actually morphed into Fox Mulder. He's Chicken Little, yelling that the sky is falling, yet no one believes him. It's crazy that they've taken an old X-Files script and basically played a game of "Mad Libs", just inserting new characters into the roles of previous ones. Even the set pieces are just swapped around, trading a nuclear power plant (think "The Beginning") for a water treatment facility. At least The Lone Gunmen are here to add some much needed humor. Thank God they've managed to dodge a bullet all this time.

"Writing out" an important character is never easy, and I wouldn't even have a clue where to begin to explain Mulder's absence if I were a script writer. Another favorite series of mine is Homicide: Life On The Street, which debuted in 1993 and had even worse luck when it came to several of its lead characters. A few times they lost a lead actor between seasons, so the writers never had a chance to properly explain that character's disappearance. However, when they did get around to finally crafting an episode to tie up those loose ends later along in the season, it was always a worthy conclusion. Chris Carter should've taken notes. I do have to hand it to Chris and co. for their casting of Robert Patrick as Agent Doggett. He plays the role well as this Clint Eastwood-styled gunslinger, which is the best description that I have for him since he appeared last season. His quick scene with Kersh in the elevator at the "Hoo-vah" Building is the true highlight in this episode. Maybe the best course of action would have been to continue on with Doggett and Scully as partners, or even Doggett solo, rather than tip the scale by adding Reyes as a full-time member of "Team Doggett." I guess that'll be continued next time in "Nothing Important Happened Today, Part 2."